Chapter 1 - The Push

My son looked me in the eye before he tried to kill me.
"I'm sorry, Mom," Daniel whispered.
Then he let go.
My wheelchair shot across the wet boards. For one strange second, I saw everything clearly: the loose nail by the railing, Stacey's red fingernails gripping Daniel's sleeve, the black water waiting beyond the dock. Then the front wheels went over, and the whole world tipped.
The lake hit like a concrete wall. Cold punched the air out of my lungs. Metal dragged at my legs. Above me, the pale rectangle of sky trembled and broke apart.
Don't fight the chair, I told myself. Fight for the surface.
I'd spent thirty-three summers teaching kids to swim at Miller Lake. After the truck accident took most of the strength from my left leg, I had convinced myself that part of my life was over. But muscle memory doesn't care what you believe about yourself.
I slipped beneath the safety strap Daniel had insisted I use. My shoulder screamed. The chair sank, and I pulled myself toward the dock pilings, hand over hand, until my fingertips found the rusty rung of the old maintenance ladder.
I stayed under the dock, coughing lake water into my sleeve, while footsteps crossed the boards above me.
"Did you see her come up?" Daniel asked.
"No," Stacey said. Her voice was calm enough to order coffee. "And you didn't either. Remember that. The brake slipped. She went over before we could grab her."
"We should call somebody."
"We will. Give it a minute."
A minute. She was giving my death sixty more seconds to become believable.
I climbed the ladder behind the boathouse, shaking so hard my teeth knocked together. From the shadows I watched Daniel kneel at the edge of the dock. He was crying. Stacey stood behind him with one hand on his shoulder, already rehearsing grief.
"Just like Robert," she murmured. "People know this lake takes lives."
My husband had drowned here three years earlier.
I had called it an accident, too.
I crawled through the reeds toward the closed bait shop. I needed dry clothes, a phone, and somebody who wouldn't hand me back to my family. I reached the back door just as a truck rolled slowly into the gravel lot.
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Its headlights landed on my soaked face.
The driver killed the engine and said, "Evelyn? I thought you were already dead."